I nose Dixie! Shee eez smart az ze whip, a sly kynda bawdy humour lyke Mae West, und shee maykeths mee feel special. Shee's vun-ov-ze-kynde.

Ax herr tou telleth aryooo ze story sometime. Boy-hoooo shee kin tell ze storeeeeee!

Get aryooo some DiXXXie!

I miss Dixie! I haven't seen her in months! :(

I know where Dixie is. She has been traveling around with me and my band of midget gypsy buffoon geishas Together, Dixie and I have been teaching people the ancient art of amazing oral. There was way too much talk of women not being able to give decent head these days and so
Miss De La Tour headed up the troupes to bring decent head to the most deserving men around the world.
Dixie and I were just in the South of France visiting Johnny Depp, where we did an intensive workshop with his wife Vanessa Paradis. She is such a cute woman- sweet, fairylike all that... but we were getting reports from Johnny's friends that she couldn't suck cock to save her life. Not wanting Johnny to live a life of bad blowjobs, and wanting to respect his inherant monogomy (Something Miss Dix can appreciate), we set to work giving Vanessa our cocksucking secret recipes.
It took a few days to really nail those techniques into Vanessa's jaw. Johnny found me and Dixie the most amazing French men to blow in order to demonstrate our special powers. Then ... the most amazing thing happened... when Mr and Mrs Depp saw the joy that these men experienced as Dixie and I blew them, the sheer unadulterated BLISS - they felt their scalp tingle, that warm sensation ... UH OH Johnny got the largest boner he ever had felt and Vanessa wet the seat at the sight of his gigantic rod. Instantaniously, Vanessa knew that it was meant for us to be the Sacred Whores of Johnny Depp. She annointed us with his heavenly pre- cum and let us go to town.
Needless to say it was the day that Venus shone brightest in the sky. It was the day that I found glitter platform sandals for $5. It was the day Subway had the meatball marinara sub for $2.49 ...
It was the day Johnny finally got the blowjob he deserved! His cum was like a million angels with chocolate eclairs, it was the sun shining on a cute Philipino strippers perfect ass, it was more than a million dollars and farther than Kathmandu and as limitless as outerspace.
The Depps were so appreciative that they bought Dixie a yacht with a team of young nubile willing Grecians that peeled us grapes and threw our legs open to go down on us with insatiable hunger as if dogs in a third world country (or Ghandi after one of his little hunger strikes...)
ah, the good life.
Thank the stars I am a good cocksucker.
And that Dixie is the BEST. (friend and cocksucker)

My GAWD, you people are weird. I love you, and I love your weirdness!
Yeah, what P-raw said....I've been off the radar, blowing Johnny Depp (if you've never had a Dixie/P-raw tag team, you've missed out..but then, most have...P-raw, we need to tell our victims in future to NOT take the malaria vaccine. It leaves a nasty aftertaste) and apparently, other strangers since they're now finding me on this tribe and saying that they were impressed when we hooked up but now that they've seen this tribe, they're way impressed. How should I really feel about that?! It's very strange to see yourself sexually reviewed on tribe, especially from a guy you hooked up with 2 years or so ago....
But then, I like the unexpected so I guess I'm OK with it. That, and it was a good review!
I have been missing all of you, and want to see my peeps sometime soon.....drinks at the Attic? Cawfee in the Mission, since I now live down here? Come over and watch porn? I need gossip, I need a story swap, but Mostly, I need to see YOU.
So call me, email me, hook up with me......any and all.
Shane and Johnny: Shhhhhhhhh.
Spanky: thanks for the fabulous. You did, too, as always.
Emmy: are you bragging?! Let's make out in a hot tub soon, OK?
Madame Gonzaga: I can never understand a fucking word you say, but I love you. Thank God for the telephone or I'd never comprehend a word you say!
P-raw: I miss you terribly. How can I tag team without you?! ( I called P-raw the other day to tell her a hilarious story about a guy who was convinced he'd hooked with me at a Kinky Salon; I called P-raw cause there was some confusion about whether I was painted green at the time, and it sounded like he'd hooked up with her and thought it was me...whut?! She's a brunette, I'm a redhead and there's a few other differences...I had to keep saying it had never happened til he finally asked for a date, being that we'd never done that deed. So thanks, P-raw!)
And all the rest of you: I'm not on Tribe that often these days, but would love to hear from you.
LET'S MAKE PLANS, People!